Airports :)

I've decided that I cannot wait to fly home today. I had the day off and thus this evening Kristin and I decided to watch a Nooma video. We watched Luggage which is set in an airport and talks about forgiveness. Another great Nooma which really made us think, but the whole video all I could think of was flying as it's set in an airport! I think why I love to fly is because of airports. I love getting there, seeing all the people rushing to and fro, sipping dunks as you wait for your plane, buying a cheesy book to pass the time, guessing where everyone is going, and just waiting. So often I get caught up in the rush of life in America that I don't stop and just look around. Airports have always been a time of yes rushing, but also stopping and getting a chance to look around for once.
Last year I flew to Calvin with one of my best friends Sarah Hathaway. When we got to the airport in Manchester they immediatly postponed our flight due to a huge snow storm and thus we didn't actually take off until 3 hours later. This gave me some time to just sit and enjoy the airport. My favorite thing is when it rains and you're able to sit inside knowing you're about to leave the rain behind. Sometimes you're going someplace with equally dismal weather...such as Sarah and I ended up doing, but other times you're heading to Florida or California. Our adventure didn't end here, Sarah and I ended up having to reschedrule our trip back due to a HUGE snowstorm which blew into the area the day we were schedruled to depart. When we finally got home I must admit that I didn't want to fly for a long long time. Yet here I am sitting in France and all I can think about is flying.
All year whenever my friends and I saw a plane we played a game. We would ask each other if we were on that plane where would we want to be going. For me the answer was definite. I knew that I wanted to be in France and every plane I saw I wanted to be heading there. Now it's funny because once again I look up and find myself playing this game with myself. A lot has changed since I've last played. My friends are scattered across the whole country and world. Everything I once thought certain has now changed. Things I thought unbreakable are now broken. I have discovered which friendships are going to last and those who I will lose due to distance and just the differences in our lives now. I have learned to live seeing what's going on from the outside, getting the updates here and there, but basically almost watching life going on without me. This is not to say that I have stopped living, in fact I have learned to live in a different culture and adapt to a much different manner of living and I find that I like it. So now as I watch the planes fly overhead here in France I am struck with not having the answer to where am I flying anymore. There is a part of me that says I want to be on the next plane home to you all, to Boston and that dirtyyy water. I want to have my starbucks and sit in barnes and noble watching the leaves change and snow fall. The other part of me still screams France. I want to sit here with Mike, Kristin, and Doris forever. Recently I guess I am facing this game everyday as in a week Kristin and I will be flying on back to good old Boston. I'm excited and yet not. I want to see everyone, go back to "normal", to drive with music blaring and my car windows open, to just be free and not have to work every second, I want to laugh so hard my stomache hurts with my girls, I want to go out to dinner dressed up, I want to go to Cosco and load up on american food, I want to go into Starbucks and order a tall hot chocolate and have them actually understand me in ENGLISH and I want to sit in my kitchen holding my cat and hearing Helen play piano. Yet I don't want to leave France, I never ever want to leave France. There's a part of me that could and will live here forever, and yet I think even if I did live here a part of me will always be more comfortable in America. So yea...thats basically what Kristin and I have been discussing lately. It's going to be sooo strange to go back to America. It's going to be exciting and so nice to be home, yet the whole time I'm home I'm going to wish I'm in France because it's home too now. And all this from watching a silly Nooma video set in an airport!